Great build up, but sex was too short.Anonymous readerReport 2009-11-22 11:03:08Good story idea, but the writing is, well, bad. Honestly, the story had a great start in this chapter, but for future chapters, proofreading before submitting keeps the flow of the story going.«1» Great build up, but sex was too short.Mark TwaynReport 2009-11-22 15:21:17It’s your best story for me. Sex Great build up, but sex was too short.Mark TwaynReport 2009-11-22 15:21:17It’s your best story for me. 5 comments«1»Mark TwaynReport 2009-11-22 15:22:04It’s your best story for me. Check your work better and try againAnonymous readerReport 2009-11-21 23:02:16Proofreading goes a long ass way to making a good story great. Sorry, but you are a story teller, not a writer.Cactus JackReport 2009-11-22 07:47:12Great idea that almost worked. Great build up, but sex was too short.Mark TwaynReport 2009-11-22 15:21:17It’s your best story for me. Check your work better and try againAnonymous readerReport 2009-11-21 23:02:16Proofreading goes a long ass way to making a good story great. Great build up, but sex was too short.Anonymous readerReport 2009-11-22 11:03:08Good story idea, but the writing is, well, bad. 5 comments«1»Mark TwaynReport 2009-11-22 15:22:04It’s your best story for me. Honestly, the story had a great start in this chapter, but for future chapters, proofreading before submitting keeps the flow of the story going.«1»
